Image of Miley Cyrus Captured On Digital Camera Somewhere

This picture brings no less than four things to the forefront of my brain:

1. Miley is way less attractive in the face than I remember and this disappoints me twice as much as it may disappoint you because she was totally on my list of post-career-collapse conquests and now I'm not so sure. My world is being shaken like a snow globe right now.
 
2. I can't believe neither Miley nor her hair-stylist/best-friend have iPhones. Have they not heard of them yet? Are they still on Sprint because they didn't want to pay that crazy early-termination fee? Don't

3. That bag is awesome. I want one--it looks like a Hefty bag with a $4500 price tag on it and everybody will totally be jealous when they see I have one.

 4. This girl is worth more than $25 million and I can't afford a used taco right now.


Dessert:

Talk about a dear in headlights! (Pun!) This flash is so bright that Miley looks two-dimensional. Also, are those jeans actually jean-printed spandex? I'd believe it...

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