Friday, August 7, 2009

Very Kind, Indeed!


After eight years of sleepless nights and near-constant regret, fortune has once again smiled upon Ma & Pa Clinton, as they recently discovered a nearly-impossible-to-locate-trust-me-they-tried Kenyan man's 2000 offer of 40 goats and 20 cows for their daughter's hand was still valid.

As elated as a Hollywood producer landing Johnny Depp for scale, President Aeternus Bill Clinton finally opened that dusty box of Cubans he's been saving since Chelsea's bittersweet sixteen and had a good long smoke with his incredulous Secret Service team.
"I bet Kim Jong-il is kicking himself now!" He laughed heartily, recalling his recent clandestine lobbying efforts in North Korea. "I told him 20 goats and a pirated Golden Girls collection was an insult, and lo and behold..."
The silver fox trailed off, unsure how to finish this sentence, a cocktail of emotions swirling beneath his regal facade.
"Well, I guess sometimes words just have their limit, my friends--and that's why the good Lord invented jazz."
And just like that, Bubba hefted his battered and bruised alto saxophone and fudged his way through some Coltrane.

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