Sunday, February 28, 2010

The Next Three-Day Blockbuster Already in the Bag



Seeing as this movie not only stars Jennifer Aniston and Adam Sandler but has already undergone a transformation from Holiday in Hawaii to Pretend Wife to Just Go With It (Oooh, I hate it when they're right...eventually...), I don't have high hopes for this product.

By the way, we can go ahead and call this a product instead of a movie, right? I didn't think I'd hear any objections.

Let's looks at the evidence:

Production budget = $52 million
Advertising budget = $100 million (estimated)
Total budget = $152 million
"Yikes. This movie needs to make some money! Should we make it good or sugar-coat it for the masses?"

"Experience dictates a vote for the sugarcoat, sir."

"Carlson?"

"I'd have to agree. Under those terms, projections indicate $75 million for the four-day weekend, plus foreign take around...$30 million, a 70% drop in second-weekend sales, but still on enough screens to pile up some more B.O, plus a steady stream of rental income to catch the stragglers. I see a profit here, gentlemen."

"Alright--let's do this turd. Get me whoever wrote Valentine's Day on the horn right now. If we can't get him, we'll get that kid that did Lucas in Love. And the guy who directed Zohan. He's killer. Meanwhile, sign every actor and model you can think of who'll sell themselves out for some cash."
- overheard in an imaginary office somewhere
You know Jen is sweatin' this one. She's sweatin' that comparison photo, this sexier, younger version of herself. Do you see the fear in her eyes?

It's a tough life on top.

_

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