Monday, February 8, 2010

I'll Have a Heart Attack, Please

Tired of paying for food?

Just gain like 200 pounds, move to Arizona or Florida, and you can eat for free until you die young. It's true!

Two cardiac-arrest-themed fast food joints on opposite sides of country are locked in a federal lawsuit over restaurant themes.

Heart Attack Grill in Chandler, Ariz. has sued Heart Stoppers Sports Grill in Delray Beach, Fla. Heart Attack's owners argue that Heart Stoppers is too similar to their own restaurant.

Both feature monstrously fatty menus, scantily-clad "nurse" waitresses, and signage with an EKG design. At both restaurants, customers over 350 lbs. eat for free. At Heart Attack Grill, customers who finish the biggest burger on the menu get wheeled out of the restaurant in a wheelchair.

According to Heart Attack's owners, the proprietors of Heart Stoppers were in talks to open a franchise of Heart Attack Grill before they opened their own restaurant in December.
(full article here)
Well, I think the lawsuit is pretty cut and dry, in favor of the Heart Attack Grill. But what about all the future lawsuits, from customers who actually do have heart attacks after eating at their restaurant? I mean, they don't really have a leg to stand on there, since they practically brag about how their food causes heart attacks...



Karl said...

I guess I appreciate the honesty behind this chain. I guess.

If this is successful, are they going to open a string of strip clubs called "House of Boners?"

Goodtime Charlie said...

Well, it might be more fitting if they called it The Masturbation Station and handed out bottles of moisturizer and a business card for the Rapist Hotline to everybody as they leave...