Are You Team Cain or Team Abel?

Will Smith, have you no shame?

Deadline New York has some totally tubular news for all those sexually-frustrated Twihard Christians out there that have been waiting their entire lives for a more relatable version of the story of Cain and Abel (read: with vampires):

EXCLUSIVE: Will Smith has attached himself to star in and produce The Legend Of Cain, an epic re-telling of the Biblical sibling tale, this time with a vampiric twist. Smith will play Cain, the original Bad Boy, and he will produce with Overbrook Entertainment partners Jada Pinkett Smith (his wife), James Lassiter, and Ken Stovitz. The script was written by Caleeb Pinkett and Dan Knauf, with Andrea Berloff revising. No studio or director yet for the Overbrook project.

Hmmmm...time to develop some CGI ab software so Mr. Scientologist doesn't disappoint the built-in audience for this historic adaptation of the Book of Vampires and I can become an overnight millionaire with my finger in the Biblical pie.

Any talented (and preferably sexy) programmers out there willing to work for Snausages?

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