Thursday, March 18, 2010

Is America Ready?

As shocking as it may be for you to hear, my reaction to the news that North Korea executed its finance chief by firing squad recently is one of conditional envy.

Americans disgusted by the gross inefficacy of their supposed representatives in supposedly-democratic Warshington should be so lucky as to have decisions made so swiftly, responsibility bestowed so irrevocably.

Lloyd Blankfein's Money Bin

Imagine if we had executed the smug criminals of Wall Street when they came to the Hill to beg for help in their continued quest to rape and pillage the working class. Imagine the fear their fate would have placed in the hearts and minds of their would-be successors, imagine their good behavior.

Alabama Senator Jeff Sessions

Imagine the sudden tidal wave of morality that would wash the mountains of filth out of the halls of Congress, should a handful of hypocritical philanderers, inveterate racists, and corporate lapdogs face the gallows on FOX News. Imagine respecting a politician for the service he performs for his country.

Jon Stewart for Dictator?

Yes, sir--provided your dictator is benevolent and intelligent, change can be swift, justice attainable, and the world a better place.

Too bad they never are...


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