What kind of a name is Glenn, anyway?In a rare moment of beauty, millionaire actress Glenn Close showed the world, unabashedly, just how much she loves herself by making out with her star on Hollywood Boulevard during the unveiling ceremony.
Sources close to Close say the exceedingly-vain behavior had nothing to do with her being overwhelmed by finally receiving what she deserved after her very first role--evidently she does the same thing every time she catches a glimpse of herself reflected in a mirror, window pane, or polished object.
"I just can't help myself! I mean, could you? Look at me! I am eminently beautiful, lovable, and the best kisser I have ever known. Trust me."
Ms. Close then noticed her face gracing a magazine cover at a nearby newsstand and fainted into several piles of human excrement on the sidewalk. Her 2nd Assistant immediately thanked God for his swift and undying sense of justice as her 1st Assistant phoned Donatella Versace to demand immediate delivery of a new pantsuit.
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