Friday, April 2, 2010

Fat Friday, Vol.5


Due to intense lobbying by the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance, KFC has finally bowed to the pressure and combined the deliciosity of bacon, cheese, and fried chicken into one artery-clogging pseudo-sandwich wad of grease their membership has been clamoring for lo these many years.

Fried chicken as bread, huh? How come nobody thought of this before? Oh yeah, because chicken used to be real meat with bones in it and people didn't use to require bacon with every meal.


So, whether you are lean, mean and unhappy, or maybe just a bit pudgy and finally looking to get serious about becoming obese, then KFC's soon-to-be-released Double-Down is for you.

To be on the safe side, I recommend lining up outside your local KFC by midnight on April 11th, so that you are fully prepared to arrest your heart with this deliciously fried, 99% non-meat super treat at the very first opportunity.

_

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

not that i think the government should be sticking its nose in to regulate/outlaw this kind of thing, but how the hell does something like health care reform possibly stand a chance at making Americans healthier, when this is the kind of thing we're up against? smart people with advanced degrees in chemistry and psychology are hard at work figuring out a way to get us to cram more calories into our faces so that yum! brands can continue paying its shareholders nice dividends.

for an interesting look at how things came to be this way, i can't speak highly enough of michael pollan's "the omnivore's dilemma", some which's points are summed up nicely here:
You Are What You Grow
and for a fascinating (if depressing) look at the topic, watch this:
Mark Bittman on What's Wrong With What We Eat

Goodtime Charlie said...

I know what you mean about ambivalence regarding government interference. Where do you draw the line? Wherever they decide to draw the line, I wouldn't complain if it involved banning partially-hydrogenated corn syrup, trans fats, and sewage from my food/drink.

KFC, Taco Bell, Pizza Hut, Dominoes, Jack in the Box...forget about it. Might as well just scoop out some sludge from a chemical toilet...