"Yes, it's an emergency. I was online tonight and somebody mentioned that Chad Michael Murray is a douche. I had no idea who he was, so I looked him up and this is what I found:"
[Reads this link in its entirety]
"Yeah, I know, this girl--nay, 25 year-old woman--has got a Chad Michael Murray fetish that I fear just won't quit until she literally owns his bloody, douchey heart and secrets it away in her hope chest. I think he's in grave danger."
[listens]
"Yeah, I'll hold."
_
1 comment:
please do; i'm in room 411, holding a martini the size of the eiffel tower and balancing an elephant on my phallus. hurry.
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